{"id":99,"date":"2005-11-18T12:38:42","date_gmt":"2005-11-18T12:38:42","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.pat-matthews.com\/stories\/2005\/11\/18\/rash-please\/"},"modified":"2005-11-18T12:38:42","modified_gmt":"2005-11-18T12:38:42","slug":"rash-please","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.pat-matthews.com\/stories\/2005\/11\/18\/rash-please\/","title":{"rendered":"Rash Please!"},"content":{"rendered":"

The other night, as dinner was winding down, I decided to run a little experiment with the kids. The food was all gone (even the vegetables<\/a>), and J was in her "stuff as much fruit down them as they can eat" mode. I think I’ve mentioned this before<\/a>. It consists of the kids saying "all done" and J saying "how about some grapes?"<\/p>\n

In any event, during a pause in the action, I made my eyes as big as they could go and slumped way down in my chair so my chin was just barely above the table. I then said in the quietest most pleading voice I could manage "Momma, could I have some Rash<\/a>?"<\/p>\n

C stopped eating mid bite, staring at me. Then he looked at his momma, "Momma, could daddy have some rash? Please? Some Rash?"<\/p>\n

J was torn between laughing at us and being Not Happy – so I continued. "Please, just a little bit?" I held my fingers up so she could see what a "little bit" was.<\/p>\n

C leaped right on to the bandwagon without a second’s hesitation. "Please, just a little bit? A little Rash? Please?"<\/p>\n

After a pause, he had a moment of inspiration and added "Me too? Could I have some Rash too? Please?" He nodded. "Just a little bit. A little bit of Rash for Daddy and Me?"<\/p>\n

N must have caught on at that point, because he put both hands over his head and shouted "Cream!"<\/p>\n

This was too much for momma. She burst out laughing.<\/p>\n

We got our Rash. More importantly, though, the pattern has been set: It’s the guys against the girls – and there’s only one girl.<\/p>\n

It’s good to be the daddy.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

The other night, as dinner was winding down, I decided to run a little experiment with the kids. The food was all gone (even the vegetables), and J was in her "stuff as much fruit down them as they can eat" mode. I think I’ve mentioned this before. It consists of the kids saying "all […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[117],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-99","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-daddytales-general"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p6DpYi-1B","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.pat-matthews.com\/stories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/99","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.pat-matthews.com\/stories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.pat-matthews.com\/stories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.pat-matthews.com\/stories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.pat-matthews.com\/stories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=99"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.pat-matthews.com\/stories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/99\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.pat-matthews.com\/stories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=99"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.pat-matthews.com\/stories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=99"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.pat-matthews.com\/stories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=99"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}