{"id":86,"date":"2005-10-19T11:48:03","date_gmt":"2005-10-19T11:48:03","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.pat-matthews.com\/stories\/2005\/10\/19\/the-saga-of-the-hat\/"},"modified":"2005-10-19T11:48:03","modified_gmt":"2005-10-19T11:48:03","slug":"the-saga-of-the-hat","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.pat-matthews.com\/stories\/2005\/10\/19\/the-saga-of-the-hat\/","title":{"rendered":"The Saga of the Hat"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>Those who have been following daddy tales have undoubtedly started to notice that I am frequently uncertain as to what to do next. Being a dad seems to involve a ridiculous amount of confusion, guesswork, and improvisation. Aggravation, frustration, and fatigue are every day occurences when you&#8217;re dealing with a couple of toddlers.<\/p>\n<p>This is not to say that I&#8217;m complaining. Just the opposite, in fact. Let me explain.<\/p>\n<p>Last year, we took a trip to a Leu Gardens (local botanical gardens on a fairly minor scale). As we were wandering about, we found our way to a wooden pier jutting into a lake.<\/p>\n<p>We walked out and were looking across the lake when C lost his hat over the balcony. It&#8217;s a pretty cool hat and C was very upset.<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;My Hat! My Hat! Oh No! My Hat!&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>Trying to avoid going for a swim, I ran over and grabbed a 10 ft.&nbsp;section of PVC pipe that I&#8217;d seen lying on the side of the trail. I&#8217;m guessing it was going to be used for more drainage, but to me it was just a really big stick. I stuck it over the side and tried to catch the hat on the tip.<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;Oh No! Catch it, Daddy!&nbsp; Catch it!&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>I wasn&#8217;t quick enough. Despite my dad&#8217;s help &#8211; and that of a passing stranger who had witnessed the whole drama &#8211; the hat floated away towards a muddy little peninsula.<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;Oh No! It&#8217;s going away! My Hat!&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>Committed now, I ran back to shore, jumped the fence and ventured out on to the peninsula. Note to readers: don&#8217;t do this yourselves. I didn&#8217;t know this at the time, but going out there was a very bad idea. It turns out that an alligator lives there, and yes, he is quite large. Fortunately, he was off doing something else when I invaded his home to rescue my son&#8217;s hat.<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;Be careful daddy!&nbsp; Be careful!&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>After plodding through some really, really muddy terrain, I managed to use my improvised PVC pole and rescue the hat. As I climbed back up over the fence and on to the pier, C came running over to me.<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;Yay, Daddy! Yay, Daddy! Yay!&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>I handed him the hat with a smile, and started trying to kick some of the mud off my pants. <\/p>\n<p>He tried to put it on, but his mom (and grandma) wouldn&#8217;t let him. It was too dirty, they said. You couldn&#8217;t put that on your head. Too dirty. They wanted to take it away entirely, but I exerted some of my newly won hero status, and he was allowed to hold it.<\/p>\n<p>Yay, Daddy.<\/p>\n<p>Yep. That&#8217;s me. I&#8217;m daddy.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Those who have been following daddy tales have undoubtedly started to notice that I am frequently uncertain as to what to do next. Being a dad seems to involve a ridiculous amount of confusion, guesswork, and improvisation. Aggravation, frustration, and fatigue are every day occurences when you&#8217;re dealing with a couple of toddlers. This is [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[118],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-86","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-daddytales-c"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p6DpYi-1o","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.pat-matthews.com\/stories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/86","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.pat-matthews.com\/stories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.pat-matthews.com\/stories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.pat-matthews.com\/stories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.pat-matthews.com\/stories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=86"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.pat-matthews.com\/stories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/86\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.pat-matthews.com\/stories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=86"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.pat-matthews.com\/stories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=86"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.pat-matthews.com\/stories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=86"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}