One of the kids’s favorite songs is “Fast Monkey”, by SteveSongs. If you hadn’t heard it, here’s a little taste:<\/p>\n
\nI’m fast,
I’m really really fast.
I’m faster…
than a fast monkey!<\/em><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\nThe song repeats this lyric subtituting in a different word for fast each time: slow, loud, quiet, and so forth.<\/p>\n
The reason it’s such a favorite is that we’ve started using it when every anyone says “I’m.”<\/p>\n
For example, if you say “I’m hungry,” someone will say “I’m really really hungry,” and then everyone will finish with “I’m hungrier…than a hungry monkey.”<\/p>\n
Harmless enough, right?<\/p>\n
The other day after dinner, as our five-year old was working on his homework, he heaved a deep sigh. “Oh man,” he said. “This is hard.”<\/p>\n
Without thinking, I said “It’s really, really hard.” <\/p>\n
“It’s harder,” he responded, “than a hard monkey!”<\/p>\n
My wife and I looked at each other and tried not to smile.<\/p>\n
He started to giggle. “That’s funny, because it’s a different kind of hard.” <\/p>\n
I very carefully didn’t say anything. He is, after all, only five, and I’m sure he wasn’t thinking what I was.<\/p>\n
“Because monkey’s aren’t hard like homework is hard.” he said, laughing. “They’re a different kind of hard.”<\/p>\n
I took a careful drink of water. My wife left the table, turning her back to us as she went. I’m fairly sure I saw her shoulders shaking.<\/p>\n
“You’re right,” I said. “That is pretty funny.”<\/p>\n
“Mmm, yeah,” he said, going back to his homework.<\/p>\n
I’m not entirely sure what he was talking about, but that’s okay. I think some things are better left unknown.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
One of the kids’s favorite songs is “Fast Monkey”, by SteveSongs. If you hadn’t heard it, here’s a little taste: I’m fast, I’m really really fast.I’m faster…than a fast monkey! The song repeats this lyric subtituting in a different word for fast each time: slow, loud, quiet, and so forth. The reason it’s such a […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[123,122,119],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-651","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-daddytales-cute","category-daddytales-n","category-daddytales-funny"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p6DpYi-av","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.pat-matthews.com\/stories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/651","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.pat-matthews.com\/stories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.pat-matthews.com\/stories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.pat-matthews.com\/stories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.pat-matthews.com\/stories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=651"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.pat-matthews.com\/stories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/651\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.pat-matthews.com\/stories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=651"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.pat-matthews.com\/stories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=651"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.pat-matthews.com\/stories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=651"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}