{"id":554,"date":"2009-01-19T15:02:03","date_gmt":"2009-01-19T15:02:03","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.pat-matthews.com\/stories\/2009\/01\/19\/young-rhinos\/"},"modified":"2009-01-19T15:02:03","modified_gmt":"2009-01-19T15:02:03","slug":"young-rhinos","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.pat-matthews.com\/stories\/2009\/01\/19\/young-rhinos\/","title":{"rendered":"Young Rhinos"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>There&#8217;s an old-fashioned putt-putt golf course down by the marina in the old city of St. Augustine. It doesn&#8217;t have any large structures, windmills, or anything like that, but it&#8217;s a nice little relaxed course with a great view of the St. Johns. Last time we visited St. Augustine, we asked the kids if they wanted to give it a try.<\/p>\n<p>The response was resoundingly positive.<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;Yeah! Yeah!&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;Okay,&#8221; I said. &#8220;But let&#8217;s do teams.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>I suggested teams for two reasons. The first was so that each of the kids would have someone to teach them. When they&#8217;re playing against you, they don&#8217;t like you to show them how to play. The other reason is because I didn&#8217;t want to spend all day at the putt-putt golf course. By playing teams (alternating hits on each hole), we can be assured of finishing the course in a reasonable amount of time.<\/p>\n<p>I had barely finished my suggestion when my youngest shouted, &#8220;I&#8217;m on Daddy&#8217;s team!&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;Hey great idea,&#8221; I said. &#8220;Let&#8217;s do the youngest against the oldest!&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;What?&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;You&#8217;re younger than your brother, and I&#8217;m younger than Momma. It&#8217;s the youngest against the oldest!&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>That got me two shouted &#8220;yeahs!&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;We can be the rhinos,&#8221; my youngest said. &#8220;That&#8217;s our team.&nbsp;We&#8217;re the rhinos!&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;The young rhinos?&#8221; I asked. <\/p>\n<p>&#8220;Yeah &#8211;&nbsp;the Young Rhinos!&#8221; He pumped his fist in the air. &#8220;We&#8217;re the Young Rhinos!&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>My oldest couldn&#8217;t let that pass. &#8220;Okay! Then we&#8217;re the elephants! They&#8217;re bigger than Rhinos. We&#8217;re the elephants!&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;So it&#8217;s the Young Rhinos against the&#8230;&#8221; I hesitated.<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;Old Elephants,&#8221; he shouted. &#8220;We&#8217;re the Old Elephants.&#8221; He turned to his brother. &#8220;We&#8217;re gonna beat you cause we&#8217;re bigger.&#8221; He puffed his chest out. &#8220;We&#8217;re the Old Elephants!&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>My wife sighed. Her shoulders drooped. I put an arm around her. &#8220;Cheer up, old elephant,&#8221; I said, smiling.<\/p>\n<p>She shrugged me away and pointed her finger at me. &#8220;We&#8217;re gonna crush you.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;Yeah!&#8221; my oldest shouted, pumping his fist in the air.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>There&#8217;s an old-fashioned putt-putt golf course down by the marina in the old city of St. Augustine. It doesn&#8217;t have any large structures, windmills, or anything like that, but it&#8217;s a nice little relaxed course with a great view of the St. Johns. Last time we visited St. Augustine, we asked the kids if they [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[118,122,119],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-554","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-daddytales-c","category-daddytales-n","category-daddytales-funny"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p6DpYi-8W","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.pat-matthews.com\/stories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/554","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.pat-matthews.com\/stories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.pat-matthews.com\/stories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.pat-matthews.com\/stories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.pat-matthews.com\/stories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=554"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.pat-matthews.com\/stories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/554\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.pat-matthews.com\/stories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=554"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.pat-matthews.com\/stories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=554"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.pat-matthews.com\/stories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=554"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}