This is one that’s so silly I’m not going to tell you which boy said what…<\/p>\n
I was sitting on the couch one evening reading to the boys, when I noticed one of them had raised his pajama shirt and was holding his nipples while he stared at them. I stopped reading to look at him.<\/p>\n
It took him a few seconds to realize I’d stopped reading. He looked up at me, hands still pulling at his nipples. “Dad, why do boys have moles on their chest?”<\/p>\n
I pondered this for a second and then decided to go with the truth. “Well, they’re called nipples and girls have them too.”<\/p>\n
“Nah-ah!” The other boy exclaimed, pulling his shirt up.<\/p>\n
“Yep, they do. Trust me on that one.”<\/p>\n
“No they don’t!” <\/p>\n
“Really, they do – and theirs are bigger.”<\/p>\n
“Nah-ah!” one said, horrified.<\/p>\n
“I’m gonna ask momma!” the other added.<\/p>\n
At that point, I couldn’t stop myself from laughing any more. “Okay,” I laughed. “You do that. You ask momma if she has nipples.”<\/p>\n
They looked at me suspiciously.<\/p>\n
“But if you get in trouble,” I said. “You can’t blame it on me.”<\/p>\n
If you’re wondering, the answer is no, they never asked their momma. Apparently, sometimes it’s okay to trust daddy.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
This is one that’s so silly I’m not going to tell you which boy said what… I was sitting on the couch one evening reading to the boys, when I noticed one of them had raised his pajama shirt and was holding his nipples while he stared at them. I stopped reading to look at […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[123,118,122,121,119],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-500","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-daddytales-cute","category-daddytales-c","category-daddytales-n","category-daddytales-the-kids","category-daddytales-funny"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p6DpYi-84","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.pat-matthews.com\/stories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/500","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.pat-matthews.com\/stories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.pat-matthews.com\/stories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.pat-matthews.com\/stories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.pat-matthews.com\/stories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=500"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.pat-matthews.com\/stories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/500\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.pat-matthews.com\/stories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=500"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.pat-matthews.com\/stories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=500"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.pat-matthews.com\/stories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=500"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}