This past weekend, we had the most amazingly bad luck at Red Lobster. To start with, while we were waiting N fell and bumped his head on the concrete sidewalk. He developed the largest goose egg that I’ve ever seen. I mean the thing stuck out from his forehead farther than his nose did. It was huge.<\/p>\n
Thanks to some ice the restaurant provided – and some determined hugging by his momma – he calmed down for dinner.<\/p>\n
Dinner was a little slow coming, which wasn’t a bad thing. C really loves their biscuits, and he was scarfing them down. Meanwhile, J was rattled by her youngest son’s fall, and was using the time to decompress while I had took care of the boys. <\/p>\n
Shortly after the main course arrived, things took a turn for the worse. I noticed C had something of a glazed expression and asked him if he needed to go potty. He shook his head yes.<\/p>\n
He never says yes to potty.<\/p>\n
J grabbed him and ran to the bathroom. I stayed at the table, playing with N, and trying to eat some food. After 10 minutes (or so) went by a server came by and explained that my wife had asked her to come get the wipes from me.<\/p>\n
That was a pretty big clue that C had had an accident, and I spent the next ten minutes (or so) playing with N and trying to figure out what I could do: bring clothes, get the check, etc. The problem was that with them in the woman’s bathroom my options were seriously limited.<\/p>\n
So, I asked our waitress when she came by. “Excuse me, I realize this is a really big favor, but could you please see if my wife needs anything from me? She’s in the woman’s bathroom with our other son…” I gave her everyone’s names and explained the situation as best as I could.<\/p>\n
I’ll grant you that that was a huge request, but the waitress said “sure, no problem.” and disappeared.<\/p>\n
10 minutes (or so) later, J showed up with C. He was mostly undressed, and she explained that they were going to the car for clean clothes. After a little while, I finally spotted our waitress again and waved her over.<\/p>\n
Before I could say anything, she said “Oh, I spoke with your wife. Everything’s fine and she’ll be right out.”<\/p>\n
“Actually,” I said, “they just stopped by and have left the restaurant. Could I please have to go boxes and the check as quickly as possible?”<\/p>\n
She nodded knowingly and said ”I thought that’s what you’d want”, and hurried off.<\/p>\n
Now, is that the world’s worst waitress or what? I understand that sending her into the woman’s room after my wife was beyond the call of duty, but come on! “she’s fine and will be right out”? What was that?<\/p>\n
And I have no idea what her last comment meant.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
This past weekend, we had the most amazingly bad luck at Red Lobster. To start with, while we were waiting N fell and bumped his head on the concrete sidewalk. He developed the largest goose egg that I’ve ever seen. I mean the thing stuck out from his forehead farther than his nose did. It […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[117],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-33107","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-daddytales-general"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p6DpYi-8BZ","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.pat-matthews.com\/stories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/33107","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.pat-matthews.com\/stories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.pat-matthews.com\/stories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.pat-matthews.com\/stories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.pat-matthews.com\/stories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=33107"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.pat-matthews.com\/stories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/33107\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.pat-matthews.com\/stories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=33107"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.pat-matthews.com\/stories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=33107"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.pat-matthews.com\/stories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=33107"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}