{"id":188,"date":"2006-07-05T14:56:08","date_gmt":"2006-07-05T14:56:08","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.pat-matthews.com\/stories\/2006\/07\/05\/the-terrible-twos-take-two\/"},"modified":"2006-07-05T14:56:08","modified_gmt":"2006-07-05T14:56:08","slug":"the-terrible-twos-take-two","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.pat-matthews.com\/stories\/2006\/07\/05\/the-terrible-twos-take-two\/","title":{"rendered":"The Terrible Twos, Take Two"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>With C, the terrible twos came early &#8211; right around 18 months, actually. With his little brother, therefore, we&#8217;ve been hoping that maybe they wouldn&#8217;t be so &#8220;terrible&#8221;.<\/p>\n<p>The other night at dinner, however, I think&nbsp;we may&nbsp;have seen their beginning.&nbsp;The boys were being bad with a capital B. I managed to bring the older brother back under control first, which meant I got to watch J take on her youngest son. These battles are always fun to watch. Fun, that is, because I&#8217;m relishing the fact that I&#8217;m not involved.<\/p>\n<p>This particular battle ended with the little guy in time-out. The crime that sent him there was clearly ignoring his momma when she said &#8220;stop.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>Time-out at dinner is a simple thing. Since they&#8217;re both buckled into their chairs, we just turn the offending son&#8217;s chair around to face the wall. He knows that he&#8217;s not allowed to yell at this point, because there are much less interesting places where we can put the chair.<\/p>\n<p>After the time-out, J turned his chair back around and leaned in close for the all-important closing comments.<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;Why were you in time out?&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;I was loud.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;No. Why were you in time out?&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;I didn&#8217;t listen.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;That&#8217;s right. When momma says stop, you have to stop. First time, understand?&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;Yes.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;So the next time you&#8217;re going to stop when I say stop?&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>Up until now, the conversation had been pretty stereotypical. J was using a quiet understanding sort of voice. N had a subdued, sad expression. Now, however, N brought his head up, made eye contact and mouthed &#8220;no&#8221;.<\/p>\n<p>I almost burst out laughing &#8211; almost. I had to take a quick drink to cover it. J shot me a glare, trying not to laugh herself, and asked him &#8220;What did you say?&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;Yes, momma. Yes.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>Word to the wise: when you&#8217;re trying to stop yourself from laughing, don&#8217;t use soda. The carbonation really burns your nose.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>With C, the terrible twos came early &#8211; right around 18 months, actually. With his little brother, therefore, we&#8217;ve been hoping that maybe they wouldn&#8217;t be so &#8220;terrible&#8221;. The other night at dinner, however, I think&nbsp;we may&nbsp;have seen their beginning.&nbsp;The boys were being bad with a capital B. I managed to bring the older brother [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[123,122,119],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-188","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-daddytales-cute","category-daddytales-n","category-daddytales-funny"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p6DpYi-32","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.pat-matthews.com\/stories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/188","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.pat-matthews.com\/stories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.pat-matthews.com\/stories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.pat-matthews.com\/stories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.pat-matthews.com\/stories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=188"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.pat-matthews.com\/stories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/188\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.pat-matthews.com\/stories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=188"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.pat-matthews.com\/stories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=188"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.pat-matthews.com\/stories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=188"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}