{"id":1033,"date":"2010-12-24T08:29:54","date_gmt":"2010-12-24T13:29:54","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/stories.daddytales.com\/?p=1033"},"modified":"2010-12-24T08:29:54","modified_gmt":"2010-12-24T13:29:54","slug":"turning-the-tables","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.pat-matthews.com\/stories\/2010\/12\/24\/turning-the-tables\/","title":{"rendered":"Turning the Tables"},"content":{"rendered":"

One of my wife’s most-used parenting tricks is offering choices to the kids, things like “do you want string beans or peas?” or the ever popular “you can pick up your clothes, or you can go to time out.”\u00a0<\/p>\n

With that in mind, let’s move on to the tale…<\/p>\n

It’s 6:15 am on the first day of Christmas vacation, and my wife and I are trying to sleep in.<\/p>\n

“Mommy, mommy,” our youngest says as he walks into our bedroom, “can we go to the zoo today?”<\/p>\n

My wife groans. “I don’t know. I don’t think -”<\/p>\n

“Okay,” he interrupts. “Which one – Sanford Zoo or Brevard Zoo?”<\/p>\n

“What?” my wife asks.<\/p>\n

“You choose.” He gestures with his hands. “Sanford Zoo or Brevard Zoo?”<\/p>\n

“He’s using your own trick.” I whisper. “Now you have to -“, but I don’t finish.<\/p>\n

She’s way too quick to swing a pillow.<\/p>\n

Actually, I think she may have learned that from me. She wouldn’t be the first one<\/a>.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

I wish I had a more Christmas-y story for you today, but this one happened just the other day, and it was really funny.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[123,122,119],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1033","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-daddytales-cute","category-daddytales-n","category-daddytales-funny"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p6DpYi-gF","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.pat-matthews.com\/stories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1033","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.pat-matthews.com\/stories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.pat-matthews.com\/stories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.pat-matthews.com\/stories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.pat-matthews.com\/stories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1033"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.pat-matthews.com\/stories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1033\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.pat-matthews.com\/stories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1033"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.pat-matthews.com\/stories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1033"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.pat-matthews.com\/stories\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1033"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}